The plumber can’t put in the bathroom fixtures until next month. That’s a shower stall if I’ve ever heard one.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

When it comes to telling her age, she’s shy…..about ten years shy.

I didn’t believe my wife when she said she had lost one of her fingernails while making dessert. I guess the proof will be in the pudding.

Several carniverous animals were eating the carcass but the king of beasts got the lion’s share.